HomeDog NewsTrump Admits He’s Too Phony to Have Dogs. We Agree.

Trump Admits He’s Too Phony to Have Dogs. We Agree.

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trump dogs

German Shepherds can sniff out drugs, and that’s why Trump likes them, despite not having one.

In his Monday rally in Texas, Trump, per usual, shifted his tirade on the war against drugs to something else entirely—canines. After describing his content with the breeds’ capability, he elicited more roars from the crowd when he said, “You really love your dogs, don’t you?”

(Meanwhile, at home Buddy barks at the screen “I did not approve this message!”)

Then, Trump finally answered what some dog lovers have been asking: Why are you the first president in a century without a dog? (Not that we’re complaining; we wouldn’t want to subject any dog to that kind of owner.)

The answer? Poor Trump is just such a busy guy. Between his 6 am toilet tweets and undetailed days of “executive time,” it’s ridiculous to think he’d have any energy left over for a pup.

Oh, and there’s another reason.

“How would I look walking a dog on the White House lawn? Would that be…” Trump trails off while shaking his head and moving his hands as if they’re detached.

“I don’t know, it doesn’t, I don’t feel good.”

The crowd, seemingly confused by the random discussion, quiets down. Do dogs make Trump embarrassed? Like a teenager who gets red-faced when they’re seen in a mall with their parents?

“Feels a little phony to me,” Trump clarifies.

It’s probably the most honest and accurate thing Trump’s said in a while. It’s difficult to imagine him letting a dog out to roam when he doesn’t even see a problem keeping children in cages.

Trump said people tell him to get a dog because it’s good politically.

“I said, ‘look, that’s not the relationship I have with my people.’”

That’s true. You have your relationship with “your” people. Keep the pups out of it.


P.S. Your dog can now take out her frustration on Trump.

trump chew toy dog

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